Sorry that it has been such a long while in between posts. The pregnancy has been a roller coaster (to say the least). Things seem to be settling down a little. The baby that survived the past few months is fighting like crazy and seems to be stabilizing quite well. Amen! So that means back on track.
I'd like to say the past couple of months have been smooth sailing for Abby but that would be a big fat lie. She's been a bit of a mess. We can't really put our finger on it but she has been an anxiety ridden, flappy, twitchy, twirly MESS. She's perseverating on topics for days on end. At some points in the day she is almost unreachable because she is going into "Abbyland" and we're struggling to get her back.
It could be that she's picking up on the stress of what has been going on with the pregnancy. (If you don't read my other blog you can read about what's been going on HERE.) We haven't told the girls yet but they're smart and perceptive so maybe they're picking up the vibes. Maybe it's that she's not sleeping. Or maybe it's just that her anxiety issues are increasing.
I am struggling with whether to spend the money to go back to the developmental pediatrician (baby head shrinker as we call her). She was great but didn't have a ton to offer us at this point other than meds. We just don't feel like we're to the point (yet) of medicating her.
It's such a huge struggle. When we were dealing solely with motor issues and finding the right walker or helmet or braces we THOUGHT it was awful. Little did we know that we were in the easy part (for us). Those days were a matter of gathering the information and finding the money. Now we are in this gray area of never knowing what is right. No doctor has the answer, no catalog has the cure. It's frustrating and sad and disappointing all at once. SO much of the time when she's in a "loop" I just want to cry. I can't help her. I can't reach her. I feel so helpless.
Hopefully in time it will get easier and the docs will have more answers. I guess we'll see...